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« The Nina Kristensen Interview With the LG | Main | Lesbian Games and the Male Gaze »

December 11, 2007

Why Lesbian Gamers and Not Just Gamers?

The other day a straight friend of mine was discussing our lovely site here with her straight friend and the question posed between them was – “Why is it lesbian gamers and not just gamers? Why do lesbians need their own gaming site?”

This struck a chord with me, as it made me question the idea behind the site. Why do we need our own space, why can’t we all just be gamers and mingle with other gamers with no problems? Well, I think we all have our own answers to that, but for me it comes down to a few things. Firstly, having an area for ‘lesbian gamers’ means that we all know we’re in the same boat. We all like games, we’re all queer and we all want to meet others in a similar situation. Feeling that immediate sense of safety, where you can be who you are, where you can express yourself as a lesbian and a gamer is a great place to start building a community. Secondly, it’s just nice to let people know we’re here. It’s good to bring visibility to a section of the gaming community that is often overlooked. We’re almost a minority twice over as both women and then as lesbians. Having a branded space for Lesbian Gamers showcases each and every single one of us.

It is still interesting though to hear the thoughts of an uninitiated straight person. In her mind there was no logical reason for our existence, yet in our minds, it is entirely logical that we exist. What does Lesbian Gamers mean to you?

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On countless other message boards woman have posted threads looking for other moms, married gamers, older gamers, christian gamers, etc. But every time someone posts a thread looking for gay gamers it becomes a "let's not separate into little groups" issue. It made me feel like I was always the outsider no matter where I was posting. That's why I was so glad this site came along. I don't have to worry about that here. I know every woman here shares at least one common interest. ;)

On any 'mainstream' site, you mention the word 'lesbian', and all the little boys start drooling, or roll their eyes and accuse you of really being a fat guy pretending.

I'm tired of that mentality. I want to be somewhere where people are (hopefully) a bit more mature, and where who and what I am (A transsexual lesbian gamer) isn't just fodder for people's wanking.

Every now and then, I start to question why a queer people of color group exists on my college campus. Why can't they just be happy with our other queer groups? Why can't they just be comfortable with us, with people like me?

I think the thing about a group like QPOC that bugs me is that it forces me to recognize that bit of internalized racism in me. It is there no matter how hard I try to deny it. Groups like QPOC threaten me because they force me to acknowledge pieces of myself that I hate. But once I've acknowledged my issues, I'm free to work through them. However, queer people of color still deserve a place to call their own where they can congregate without worrying about how well they'll fit in with the people who should be their peers.

I hope y'all will forgive my analogy; I don't really like comparing the struggles of one minority group to the struggles of another because there are always differences. The conversation between the two straight women just reminded me of my feelings on this topic and conversations I've had with my friends.

Lesbian Gamers?
A place where we can speak freely without getting the normal homophobia and horny teenage boys.
:)

And a place where we can speak freely without getting subjected to abusive homophobic teenage boys and the banalities of horny men. ;)

Jude

I've seen this kind of question raised over other LGBT identified groups, and what it really is asking is, "why do you have to be visable? Why can't you just disappear?"

It's interesting to me that often the people who ask such a question are members of a "baptist/methodist/catholic/what-ever" church; (Why can't they just be a christian?)

I guess they just like to associate with other people whe share their feelings and beliefs...go figure.

Someone posted the interview on Nina K over at N4G, and there were comments made more so on this site than on the interview itself lol!

http://www.n4g.com/ps3/NewsCom-91930.aspx#Comments

Personally, when I first heard about this site, I thought it was just another review gaming sites. But I am surprised to learn about games with lesbian-themed/ content. So, keep up the good work!

Threw in my two cents there, Kaycee. Thanks for the link. =)

I've been going to gaygamer.net for almost a year now. It's a nice site where I get most of my information from, but it's mostly for gay guys.

Then lesbian gamers came! I feel at home! And now I have other girls who also play video games just to check out the hot female characters.

It's relaxing to go to sites like these. I feel like I fit in.

It's all about the safe space.

And hey- we're just fun.

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